Building Your Mental Health Toolbox, Part 3: The Four Legs of a Balanced Life

Lindsay Tsang • October 17, 2025

Examining Andrew Hallam's table model of finding balance.

Building Your Mental Health Toolbox, Part 3: The Four Legs of a Balanced Life

If you’ve been following this series, you know we’ve been exploring what it means to build a “mental health toolbox”—practical ways to care for your well-being both on the good days and the hard ones.

In Part 1, we looked at how to create good habits for good days.
In Part 2, we talked about coping skills for hard days.
And today, in Part 3, we’re zooming out to look at what makes life feel balanced—what psychologist Abraham Maslow might have called the foundations of well-being, or what author Andrew Hallam calls
“the four legs of success.”

Because much like a table, our mental health is only as steady as the supports holding it up.


The Four Legs of a Healthy Life

Hallam’s model is simple but surprisingly comprehensive. He suggests that to feel truly well, you need four steady legs under your “life table”:

  1. Physical and Mental Health
  2. Relational Health
  3. Financial Health (or “Enough Money”)
  4. Purpose and Meaning

If any one of these legs is missing or unstable, the whole table wobbles.

Let’s look at each one—and how you can strengthen them in your own life.


1. Physical and Mental Health: The Body–Mind Connection

This one feels obvious, but it’s easy to neglect. Good mental health depends on physical health, and vice versa. The research is clear: regular movement, good sleep, nutrition, hydration, and manageable stress all contribute to emotional regulation and resilience.

This doesn’t mean chasing perfection. It means paying attention to the basics:

  • Move your body in ways that feel sustainable.
  • Prioritize rest and recovery.
  • Be mindful of what fuels or drains you—both physically and emotionally.

The body and mind are one system. When one is depleted, the other struggles to function well.


2. Relational Health: The Power of Connection

In the longest-running study on happiness (Harvard Study of Adult Development), researchers found one clear takeaway: good relationships keep us happier and healthier.

Connection—whether with family, friends, colleagues, or community—buffers us against depression, improves immunity, and even extends life expectancy.

Relational health doesn’t require having dozens of close friends. It means cultivating a few emotionally safe, reciprocal relationships where you can show up as your authentic self.

If relationships have been hard for you, start small: reach out to one supportive person, or engage in a community activity that feels aligned with your values.


3. Financial Health: Finding “Enough”

Money isn’t everything—but not having enough can significantly impact mental health. Financial stress is linked with higher anxiety, relationship conflict, and physical illness.

That’s why Hallam calls this leg “good enough money health.” The goal isn’t wealth—it’s stability. Enough to cover your needs, handle an emergency, and have some freedom to make choices that align with your values.

There’s solid research showing that once basic needs are met, additional income has a diminishing return on happiness. What matters more is how we use our money—on experiences, security, generosity, and time spent meaningfully.

If finances are a source of stress, consider small, realistic steps: setting a monthly budget, tracking spending, or learning about healthy money habits from credible sources. Sometimes, simply gaining clarity reduces the anxiety that comes from uncertainty.


4. Purpose and Meaning: The Missing Leg for Many

This one can be easy to overlook, but it might be the most vital. Purpose gives our lives coherence—it’s the “why” behind what we do each day.

In the “Blue Zones” (regions of the world with the longest-living populations), one of the common denominators is a strong sense of purpose, often linked with community and spirituality. People in these regions don’t necessarily have more wealth or convenience—but they have meaning.

From a psychological standpoint, purpose gives us hope—a sense that we have both something to aim for and a path to get there. Without it, hopelessness and demotivation can set in. Viktor Frankl’s classic Man’s Search for Meaning describes how purpose helped people survive even the darkest circumstances.

Purpose doesn’t have to mean a grand calling. It can be found in simple things: caring for a family member, serving your community, creating something meaningful, or nurturing your faith.

The key is to ask: What makes my life feel significant? What connects me to something larger than myself?


The Balancing Act

When one of these legs weakens—say, a job loss (financial), conflict in a relationship (relational), or chronic stress (physical/mental)—we often feel it ripple through the others.

That’s normal. Life isn’t static; it’s about ongoing rebalancing. The goal isn’t to perfect all four legs, but to notice when one needs attention and gently adjust.

For example:

  • If you’re physically healthy but feel isolated, maybe it’s time to reconnect socially.
  • If you’re financially secure but burned out, maybe you need rest and reflection on purpose.
  • If you feel adrift, exploring meaning—through faith, creativity, or service—might bring grounding again.


When you think about your own “life table,” which leg feels strongest right now? Which one might need reinforcement?

Your mental health toolbox isn’t just about coping in crisis—it’s about building a stable foundation that helps you thrive. When all four legs are steady, life doesn’t just feel balanced—it feels meaningful.

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If you are struggling to find balance in your life, we are here to help. Our team of Registered Psychotherapists can support you as you establish goals and move forward. To book an appointment, please use https://resetbarrie.janeapp.com


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